Joke Time

Joke Time

In America, they say:

"Honey, that guy has a lot of offbeat, unorthodox ideas. Kinda weird -- nonconformist and unconventional, you could say, but he's just being creative by being iconoclastic. That's because he listens to the beat of his own drum."

But in Pangasinan, we say:

"Ay atan? Atapis, atiris, abalang so nonot to, abalang so kanonotan to, abetelay utek to (his brain caught some chills), abulok so ulo to, aburingkitis, aburis, aderal so ulo to (his head got damaged), aga napamintuan so ibabaga to, agetaget, agto ni awali'y mundo, aguret, akagsiw, akanat, aketket na duweg (bitten by a carabao), akudyas, akustil, nankustil, alaok so ibabaga to, alamatan, wala'y lamat na ulo to (his head got a crack), alintaweng, alinturang, alipeng, ambagel, ambagtit, ambasit, nanbasit, basit, nambasit, ambelat so sasakbaten to (he's carrying a heavy load), ambreng, angkampis, nankampis, angkesay, kesay-kesay, nankesay, apataa'y lurem (nahagip ng ulap, got hit by a cloud), apisit (squished), naksit, arageman so utek to (his brain has got blown by the wind), asibok (puffed up), asibukan na mauges a dagem (got blown upon by a bad wind), asipeg (nahagip, got bumped), ataknik, atapaaw, nantapis, atikong, atipos, nantiris, atiwel, atiwel ya singa aso, singa ason nantiwel (like a rabid dog), nantiwel, atorik, awaweng, wawaweng, awegweg, awelwel, awengweng, bagtit, baleg so bulan, bankeleng, bantiwel, bantokaling, bayakew, bubulanen, bulan-bulanen, bulatis, di katit, nankatit, walay katit to, di latlata, nanlatlata, di saltik, di galing, wala'y galing-galing to (has magical powers?), gilit-gilit, kalawakaw, katok, akatok, nangkatok , kulang-kulang (is lacking), kulang na binting, diya'd piso kulang na binting (lacks 25 centavos), kulang na bulan (lacks some months), kulang na kwerdas, kulang na pesetas, kulang na tornilyo, kutagong, kuwating, nankuwating, kuwatit, nankuwatit, linmukak so tornilyo to (lumuwag ang turnilyo, has loose screws), lokloko, loko-loko, Lucas (para'd say laki ya aderal so ulo to), Lukring, Lucresia (para'd bii ya aderal so ulo to), makakaimis ya singa bakes (seems smiling like a monkey), mamarlang, masagana 99, minsay, naambaling so ulo to, naapunan (possessed), nagtelan, nagtela'y utek to (his brain turned cold), naksit (squished), nandaiset (has a bit of something), wala'y daiset to (has a little something) , nan-F (slang, with F meaning few), nangkatiw, nankalting, akaltingan, nankampis, nankupat, nankuriring, wala'y kring-kring/wala'y kuliling, nankuliling, nankililing, nantililing, nankularing, nankularet, nankutas, akutas, nipatog ed barko, nipatog ed bulan, apatogan na bulan (got bumped at/by the moon), nansagpit na alasas, paratangtang, paratagtag, simmalagasag, sulok-sulok, tawel, taweng, terenggoy, terenta y cingco, timmerak lay katiresan to, tinmikyab so kanonotan to, tulao, wala'y banting to (has a bell), wala'y kulang-kulang to, wala'y pisisigeen to, wala'y sagar (may sayad), wala'y sarili ton mundo!"

"Lasi ka, agmo la pinunuyan. Agka la mitutungtong ditan!"